Kalzer & Hawtin Re-Watch Survivor South Pacific Episode 3 : "Reap What You Sow"

Mark Kalzer

            I admit it.  I didn’t appreciate Papa Bear when we had him.  Here was this smart, outspoken old school kind of guy, a classic Survivor character which just an amazing voice, and I just didn’t take one moment to relish his presence in my first time through South Pacific.  Seriously… just listen to his voice.  When I think of old school Survivor I think about how when the cast gets shrunken down to six or five those people left behind are really well rounded and multidimensional.  When a player’s only around for a couple episodes with 16 other Survivors you only get a hair of their personalities.  Many of the disposable models that populate casts of late stay about as dreadfully dull in the final days as they are in the early going, but I would have loved to see Papa Bear go the distance and see what kind of layers we could find in him.

            That’s one of the many things you get re-watching a season.  With the boot order stuck in your head, you really appreciate the people you missed down the road.  I just wish Papa Bear could have done something more to fix his position in the game cause the way the edit looks, he basically sized up his position as ‘screwed’ and laid in the hammock until vote time came.  It’s already been made clear by this point that there’s an alliance of five on Savaii just as there is on Upolu.  Papa Bear considers himself and Cochran and Dawn all to be on the bottom three.  That’s another thing that’s disappointing in hindsight knowing Dawn was able to move herself into the 5 and Papa Bear could not.  I recall that may have been more the work of Jim and we’ll get a closer look when the time comes. 

            Another thing I should point out before starting this recap is that between writing the last entry and this one I have listened to Dom & Colin’s Podcast where they chat with Sophie wherein she breaks down everything that went down in the game.  Now I realize these post-game interviews that propagate on the internet can never be completely inscrutable, but I also don’t take Sophie as so pretentious to rewrite entire Survivor history to suit her ego.  Of course she describes the formation of her alliance from her own point of view, to which the meeting on the beach where Coach declares the 5 was only the last part of. 

In the ‘Previously on Survivor’ segment this week, Jeff Probst puts it all on Coach having ‘conceived’ the alliance.  I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.  Jeff all but admitted at the last tribal council that Coach is his favorite member of Upolu so obviously Probst will perceive Coach to be the protagonist of the season.  I’ve mentioned before in previous rants that Jeff Probst is attracted to these kinds of men who talk at great length about themselves because in his eyes, that’s just creating great television.  It’s a common complaint that Jeff Probst has these ‘man-crushes’ on the most athletic masculine members of every cast.  Yes it registers as sexist, but remember, we are still in a sexist world.  I’m not defending this position in any sort of way, but Survivor is a network television show and everything is about ratings.  Like it or not, people love men.  In a recent acting class I took I discovered that women are being told not to be abrasive or raise their voice because then they become perceived as a bitch.  It’s crazy to think about that, but that’s still the culture we live in.  Survivor’s ratings which falls in the millions can often rise or fall on the presence of these stereotypes. 

 Also revealed on the podcast is how much it is a part of Coach’s character that he likes to feel in control, and to believe that decisions that are groups decisions are actually his decision, so this creates another paradox for the editing.  Sophie and Albert are heavily involved in the decision making but Coach keeps telling the camera that everything is his decision.  Since Sophie doesn’t want to upset Coach or give him any reason to mistrust her, she’s not really going to try to put a stop to it, nor does she really even know what he’s telling the cameras.  So of course, it may end up looking like Coach is in control.  He’s the confident male personality and he sells it really well.  Sophie sells it really well too, but she’s just a nobody at this point in her reality TV career. 

"Some day Cochran, you and I are going to get famous playing Risk."

            On to the recap.  Christina gets to redemption inland (which may be a peninsula.  Must research further.)  and says “I’m not sure what happened at Tribal.   I think my tribe wasn’t ready for someone who wanted to play the game right out of the box.”  Well Christina, there’s playing the game in a social way which is how the alliance of 5 was made, and there’s playing the game where you keep looking for a hidden idol and cling to an alliance of 2.  Maybe in Survivor Borneo your 2 person alliance might have been a powerhouse, and I suppose the two of you voting together might have made some dent in some plan.  The group is playing the game out of the gate.  She’s just not seeing because no one wants to include her after her ‘temporary player’ comment.  It just becomes so obvious how out of touch she is when she tells Semhar that she was just saying what everyone else was thinking.  Well no, if everyone was thinking that about Coach he’d be here instead of you.  You can’t just, tell people what it is they think.  Politicians try that all the time and how much do we respect those guys?  (Although it does tend to work on occasion.)

            Still in the cold opening, Mikayla is bothered by Brandon’s behavior.  Brandon says he was almost 150% sure that Mikayla was going home, which is weird cause he like, didn’t vote for her.  That should shoot your projection down to about 15% or 10% based on votes that aren’t yours or Mikayla.  Now we have the seed that will drive the rest of Upolu’s story this week.  Brandon did something cruel.  He lied.  He got dirty, and he feels guilty about it.  He went into this wanting to be a hero.  I can’t relate to this at all.  If I go on Survivor the last thing I care about is weather I’m a hero or not.  I’m there to win and weather I do it in a good or a bad way, all that matters to me is getting jury votes.  That doesn’t create great TV of course, so instead of me, we have Brandon, who wants to be a hero.  Brandon is about the farthest a player can be right now in instilling hope and adulation.  Now there’s ways you can atone for whatever sin you think you’ve committed like apologizing to Mikayla, telling her it was all on him, but will he do this?  More on this later…

            After the title sequence Edna reads the treemail announcing that two Upolu members get courtside seats at the first Redemption Island duo.  Coach immediately volunteers.  Now this is another thing you learn on Dom & Colin, that Coach loved to attend the Redemption Island duels because he knew it would get him more camera time.  Even if it consists just of out of context reaction shots, that’s more than enough for him.  Maybe Jeff Probst will ask a question or two and he’ll get to cite philosophers. 

            Speaking of reaction shots, did you get a load of the awkward faces during Semhar’s pre-duel spoken word?  Even Ozzy who once sat through a 6 hour fire making challenge found it awkward.  This is like as if you were in a long elevator ride and suddenly someone started reciting poetry.  What’s the etiquette here?  Even Jeff seemed uncomfortable.  

"What is this?!"

            Jeff?  Is that your job to editorialize on the quality of the spoken word?  No wait, that’s just about all Jeff does now is editorialize. 

            Oh I almost forgot to talk about Ozzy’s choice to take Elyse to the duel.  We know he and Elyse get close later on so this is great to comment on now.  I see this as Ozzy’s first date with Elyse.  When you’re offered lower bowl seating down at the duel why not take the cutest girl in camp?  

"Cochran could you just... give us a minute?"

Course Ozzy seemed to have a weird thing for Semhar too and really tried to keep her.  This is like Ozzy taking his current girlfriend to see his ex-girlfriend’s hockey game.  Except it’s a playoffs game and if Semhar loses she has to leave the country.  Maybe it’s more applicable to seeing his ex girlfriend’s gladiator duel after Ozzy sold her into slavery.  (Okay maybe I just went too far just there…  Screw it, I’m leaving that in.) 

            Semhar finishes her poem.  Jeff asks if that warms her up and she says it does.  Jeff checks with Christine, asks if she needs any pre-duel poetry to warm up with but she declines.  We’ll see if Christine’s going to come to regret that decision later on.

            On to the duel.  It’s the classic totem supported by extended cylinders challenge that allow Jeff to make all sorts of filthy out of context comments about how much harder it is to maintain your totem the more extended your poles get.  It’s a damn good thing Brandon isn’t here.  Jeff really put a stop to these filthy remarks after he got married.  Recall that this and One World were filmed before his wedding.

            Semhar finally loses.  Probst proclaims that Christine stays alive and continues her quest for a million dollars, as if any of us are still holding onto Christine’s remote chance.  Now seriously, any of us viewers care about this?  Are we meant to be rooting for one of these two?  I don’t get the narrative point of this exercise.  We all know both Semhar and Christine are on the outs on their tribes and if they were to make it back they’d still be on the outs on their tribes, and have missed two weeks of drama.  The only chance they have is to pull a Matt and win every duel, but then to not pull a Matt and jump right back in with their original tribe at the merge.  Christine tells the camera she’s definitely going to have to pull the first kind of Matt.  Good on her.  She knows what she has to do.  Actually, that was actually kind of redundant, her having to say that.  In fact this whole redemption inland duel nonsense is even more tedious knowing Ozzy will just pop by at the end of this run and take away Christine’s chance for glory.  Learned this week, redemption inland is even more redundant during a Survivor re-watch.  Since I’m certain only Phillip Shepherd rewatches Redemption Island with any regularity I believe I’m the first to come to this revelation. 

            So Semhar loses.  Jeff does what any good journalist does after someone experiences crushing defeat and asks Semhar how she feels.  Way to milk it Jeff. Right in front of Ozzy’s date too.  At least at Tribal Council the players voted out can do their final words in private.  Here Jeff just puts them on the spot when they’re at their lowest point.  Semhar re-iterates what she said when she last got to redemption inland and tosses her buff in the fire.  Here’s yet another thing I don’t get.  I thought fire represented your life in Survivor.  Didn’t Jeff make them bring their torches with them to redemption inland?  I suppose he already put that out so now they need something else to symbolize leaving the game and apparently it’s now your buff.  In that case Jeff should be saying ‘Your buff represents your life on redemption island.  When your buff is gone, so are you.’  Also learned, buffs aren’t as a dramatic as torches.

            We’re at about the 14 minute mark when we finally get back to authentic Survivor.  Brandon still feels guilty about his lie last week.  His god isn’t pleased with him, and his family isn’t pleased with him.  I’m guessing he’s not including Russell in that since Russell would be happy as fuck that Brandon’s getting his hands dirty.  Why is God angry though?  More precisely, how is it Brandon can hear God and I’ve had barely a whimper from him since the day I was born?  If anything Brandon’s family and god are angry because it was a terrible lie, based on terrible strategy, and it did absolutely nothing to influence the vote.  Even worse, he admitted the lie, exposing his vulnerability and his strategy.  So yes, Brandon’s family isn’t pleased with him.  I don’t frankly think god cares about reality TV what with the gravitational constants of the universe being so much more important. 

Pictured : Something that matters more than the Hantz's.

Brandon decides he doesn’t want to lie anymore and takes off his shirt, revealing to all his Hantz tattoos.  (Side note:  As he does this, Edna is shielding her eyes from the sun with the tree mail.  Has anyone else picked up on this?  Edna is HOARDING the tree mail!)  So Brandon confesses his ‘sin’ of being a Hantz.  Or was that the sin of not telling anyone his last name?  The only sin I could perceive here is lying about Mikayla but no, Brandon thinks being a Hantz is a big deal.  Brandon tells the tribe he’d rather make friends out here than a million dollars.  Way to go Brandon.  You just gave everyone another reason not to take you seriously as a player.  Nobody since the days of Pagong has come out on Survivor to make friends. 

They HAVE however come to make babies.

            Now what Mikayla says next fascinates me.  ‘That’s like an easy out for him.  He does something bad he’s like guys that’s not me.”  Is she suggesting Brandon has multiple personalities?  Is there a good Brandon on one shoulder and evil Brandon on the other, but instead of Brandon it’s actually Russell talking to him and giving him advice?  I could just imagine someone arguing in front of the jury that all the awful things they did was actually Russell’s doing.  This only worked for Natalie Whyte, and that was because Russell was actually there as a separate person, not a voice in her head.

            Stacey says “It’s water under the bridge.  Can’t judge a book by it’s cover.”  That’s true, but you can judge Brandon by what he pulled the day before.  Brandon talks about his lying as a “relapse” of what his uncle used to do.  So now lying is a chemical addiction and it’s connected to a gene that runs in the Hantz family. 

            Coach tells Brandon he has no beef with him, but as an aside he tells the camera he thinks it was a mistake for Brandon to tell everyone.  I think it was a mistake to tattoo his last name on himself but I don’t think he was thinking about Survivor when he did that. 

            We finally cut to Savaii.  Oh yes, there’s a Savaii this season too. 

            Papa Bear points out that every tribe has a pecking order and that he’s on the bottom. It’s great that Papa Bear realizes that. He seems to attribute that entirely to circumstance, and I’m a little disappointed that he sees it as a position that he cannot control. 
            Ozzy feels a certain brother thing going on between himself and Keith, so he confides in him that he has the idol. Keith then goes and tells Whitney breaking that confidence. Keith’s upset cause now Ozzy has the idol, and the power to do anything. He wishes… wait what’s going on here? Whitney is rocking the hammock with Keith in it. That’s, awesome! How is Keith managing to pull this? Are they taking turns on this? I hope George says something witty about this. (We write these separately then read them before we banter, just fyi) 

Mikayla finally confronts Brandon about the elephant in the room. (By that I mean Brandon’s problem with her. There’s no elephants in Samoa.) “Why don’t you like me?” she asks.
“Because of this.” Brandon replies. Because… she’s asking you why you don’t like her? Cause she wants to know why you tried to vote her off? You mean that isn’t a legitimate question between two adults playing Survivor? Brandon elaborates “Because of the attitude. You’re still not getting the fact that I’m trying to apologize.” I remember a Ben Stiller character in the movie Greenburg, where he famously says “Fine I’ll apologize even though I think it’s partially your fault.” That’s how Brandon apologizes. 

Pictured : Brandon apologizing.

           He is so put off by Mikayla’s alleged abrasive behavior, even telling the camera “Mikayla was coming to me like a bulldog. She was gonna attack me.” he calls a tribe meeting. That this bulldog thing is all in Brandon’s head is an understatement. At the tribe meeting Brandon calls out Mikayla for not understand his apology or something. The words we get on air are “I’m telling you as a man I wanted you out o this game. When she walked up to me the way she did I was upset. Sounds to me that you don’t have an alliance. Period.” So let me just recap here… Brandon apologized, or at least he thinks he did, Mikayla asked him why he doesn’t like her, and Brandon took that an attack of some kind. Somehow this leads him to call her out for having no alliance. Yeah… still makes no sense.

I clearly forgot Brandon isn’t here to make a million dollars. He just wants to be nice and good, and good means slamming Mikayla for having no alliance. I suppose in his mind he’s just telling it like it is. But there’s telling it like it is like how Sandra does in order to take down her opponents credibility, and there’s the other way in which it does nothing more than make your tribe mate feel terrible.  Brandon does the latter, and knowing him I’m sure he feels triumphant for it.

Brandon leaves to a stunned silence. Sophie gets the first word in confession wise. “I was in so much shock. He is a loose cannon.” She sees right there that no matter what Brandon just can’t stop himself from this. See Sophie’s a medical student so she already knows about the evil gene. Hitler had it. Walt Disney had it. Colton Cumbie has it. And if Russell Hantz had it, so does Brandon Hantz. That sounds absurd, but between him, Russell and Willie Hantz on Big Brother, there’s a real pattern of chaos. How is this family being socialized? I hate to get this personal, but if you took a Hantz child and raised him separately, would he turn out differently? Coach confides in Sophie and admits that he does see a little Russell in him. He knows Russell better than any of us, so if he can see it, there’s something there. (Aside: I’m almost positive George is going to use the exact same Simpsons quote at this point so I’m just going to point that out now to assert myself as having ‘dibs’.) 

This is probably a good time also to point out that we’ve seen next to nothing of Albert here. I don’t think he’s talked once this episode and it’s been quite Upolu heavy to this point. In fact let me just check the Confessionals Department of Survivorsucks, and yes, I am not wrong. Albert to this point has not had a single confessional. He won’t speak next week either. Sophie to contrast is only missing for one episode up ahead and I’m guessing it’s a Savaii vote that week. Just to make things clear here, Albert and Sophie already have a two person alliance and there has not been a single reference to it on the show yet. To be clear, we knew about Christine and Stacey before we knew about Sophie and Albert.

Allright. On to the immunity challenge. It feels kind of early, and we have yet to hear from Cochran and Dawn, or half of Savaii. If I didn’t know better I’d think this was building towards another Upolu boot. Sometimes the editing can trick you like that. This being only the 20 minute mark there’s still plenty of time to see Savaii. 

"I'm sure they'll get to us soon guys."

I should also praise the producers for just how balanced these tribes are challenge wise. I don’t know what they’re thinking is but I usually find that when the tribes are divided by the cast or gender we get more of an imbalance, but the producer picked tribes end up pretty even in the challenges. This is even before Ozzy and Coach picked their tribes. You’d think Ozzy would give any tribe an advantage but I suppose a single member can only do so much in these elaborate tribal challenges.

Speaking of this challenge, it is far too complicated an affair for me to try to describe. I’ll just say at some point both tribes have to turn handles. Upolu struggled with it but recovered. Story of our generation. (If George doesn’t use that reference I’m going to be really disappointed.) Savaii’s handle turning however is far inferior, Papa Bear cannot turn even as fast as Cochran can. Coach then proves his superior grappling hook skills giving Upolu a serious advantage in the banner puzzle. With help from Sophie and Mikayla, they complete the puzzle before Savaii has even reached the point of puzzle making. Upolu wins immunity and some cookies n’ things. 

This time it’s Jim Rice’s turn to speak in the challenge loss editing slot and look, he actually names Papa Bear. Notice though how he only says Papa Bear was weak in the challenge, not that he’s going home. That would be too obvious. I’ll give the editors credit at least for actually letting the mark get named here. (See what I did there?)

After the break Ozzy tells the camera that it’s between Cochran and Papa Bear. Cochran wasn’t actually half bad in the challenge this time. Dawn was even better so she is out of the running. While the group of 5 cool kids talk, Papa Bear and Cochran reminisce, Cochran sitting, Papa Bear on the hammock. Nobody comes to rock Papa Bear’s hammock. This makes Papa Bear unhappy. They’re both on the outs. Cochran just admits “We look different. We talk different. It’s obvious.” That’s true, but that’s no reason to do nothing about it.

We see the group of 5, and Jim Rice basically says that it’s Papa Bear, and they all agree. Wow that was easy. Editors making it a little too obvious this time? No, they wouldn’t dare. That’s because Papa Bear goes on an idol hunt. We already know there’s no idol to be found anymore but as Elyse says, “I saw Papa Bear sprinting. Papa Bear doesn’t sprint ever.” Since Ozzy has only told one friend he has the idol, there’s still the mild suspicion Papa Bear has it, so maybe we’re supposed to expect that they will vote for Cochran to avoid the idol Papa Bear can’t possibly have?  Yeah.  Suspenseful.

Just to go back to the strategy session though, Jim Rice tells the group that they should tell Papa Bear that it’s Cochran. If there’s anything I might like about redemption inland, it’s that it really makes you consider how you vote someone out, or at least it should. Usually you don’t need to worry about this until the jury starts, but even now you have to vote people out with the knowledge they might still come back. How you vote someone out can be very critical. It’s disappointing that Matt jumped right back in with his original tribe and Andrea hadn’t a hope of re-integrating.  We have to look back to Pearl Islands to see an outcast really shake up the game in retaliation.

That said, the idols do kind of force you to lie. I think if I had to choose between idols and redemption inland, I’d keep the idols. But if they keep redemption inland, maybe they should set aside the idols for the time being since they together already take up about 41 minutes per show.

So before we see Papa Bear scramble for the idol, we get a scene of Jim and Ozzy telling him that he’s safe and that Cochran’s going home. Notice how they avert eye contact? I will point this out again and again, if you’re lying, MAKE EYE CONTACT! If you think someone is lying to you, watch for eye contact. People who feel guilty about lying will avert their eyes. Clearly Jim and Ozzy don’t like lying to him but they kind of have to. Well maybe Ozzy doesn’t have to since he has the idol, but Jim doesn’t know that at this point so Ozzy is kind of lying for both Papa Bear and Jim as well. 
So Papa Bear doesn’t believe the lie for a microsecond. Unable to find the idol himself he makes a big show of digging in the dirt, and finding something in the shape of a rock. Yadda-yadda-yadda, he returns to camp 15 minutes later with an XL grin on his face and a bulge in his underwear. Considering he’s surrounded by hot men this could mean literally anything.

To recap, the focus of suspense going into this vote is on weather or not they are scared enough of Papa Bear’s non- idol that they’ll throw their votes onto Cochran instead. It feels like a bit of a non-starter for suspense since 3 of the 5 person alliance already know Papa Bear can’t have it. Are we to believe Jim Rice and Elyse just might switch things up?  What kind of a stupid game do we expect to see here?

We go to a tribal council that was predictable the first time we saw it. Papa Bear laments that he is a natural leader, but that he just cannot be a leader to these people. I would think being a leader means asserting yourself as leader, but there’s not a great deal of asserting happening on Savaii. 

In fact there’s not a lot of drama at this tribal council period. Cochran’s barely talked about as being in danger. The 5 person alliance is clear to everyone. They vote to the classic tribal council music. Jim writes down ‘Cockran’ in case Mark has the idol. I’m starting to suspect he’s just misspelling these names on purpose now. We’ll see if this pattern continues. 

Papa Bear goes, and the music fades from the classic tribal council theme to the bland modern 6:00 news theme they keep putting at the end. 

In the next time on Survivor segment Cochran becomes some sort of mastermind and Brandon does Brandon things. Sophie comments on it. I swear Sophie’s comment is from the same interview they used this week, last week and apparently next week. She’s got the same cute glasses and water backdrop in all three. If I can figure out a way to generate screen caps this I’ll do some comparisons. (I’ll also post a better picture of Edna’s treemail hat.) 

As for episode 3, you know I actually kind of liked it, even despite the redemption inland. Good character stuff, and good Papa Bear stuff. There’s certainly a lot to digest here.

George Hawtin
          After the previouslies, we cut to Christine arriving at Redemption Island. Semhar's first words once she got to RI was about how voting people out of Survivor is mean; Christine's are about that other old Survivor chestnut, that her tribe "was not ready for someone who wanted to play the game right out of the box". To recap, Christine's idea of "playing the game" seems to have been:

1. piss off noted bully Ben Wade;
2. talk to nobody except for Stacey;
3. cast a random throwaway vote at the first TC that wasn't even aligned with her one friend's random throwaway vote.

Yeah, the problem was the rest of them, Christine, not you. They just weren't ready for what a great player you were. You're not inept and unpleasant at all. Then, describing her tribe to Semhar, she says in an aggrieved tone, "I don't think Coach liked me at all!" Well...yeah. Before you'd even met him, you announced that he was a "temporary player". Even the kindest and gentlest people in the world would take a little bit of umbrage at that, don't you think? Never mind a heat-seeking missile like our friend Ben? Then, as far as the show showed us, she did nothing to make that happen.

I'm all in favour of the "temporary player" idea. If I were on a Redemption Island-esque season where my tribe was eight new people and one returnee, I'd gather the new people around and say, "Listen, this guy has an unfair leg up on us, and he'll probably run the game like Boston Rob did in Redemption Island and screw us all over, so let's all vote him out first." It probably wouldn't work. I'd probably arouse the new person's ire and seem like I was playing too hard and get voted out first myself. But at least I'd be trying. Christine incurred the ire without even trying to do the thing she threatened to do. Christine, in short, sucks.

Sorry Christine.

Oh, but then she says of "Coach": "He thinks he's King Farouk." Which is...kind of a random reference. The next five people who annoy me, I'm going to say, "STOP THINKING YOU'RE KING FAROUK." Okay, fine, even Christine has her good points.

Now more Brandon vs. Mikayla. I've said everything I have to say about that. I can't deal with that shit. Oh, now Brandon is making his patented "I didn't want to be like Russell, I wanted to be a hero" speech, which a vexing number of people tend to take at face value. Okay, here's the thing. Brandon is not a hero. Brandon is insane. He has many of the same problems as his uncle - misogyny, ego - but *none of the things that make Russell compelling*, like the ability to get people to do what he wants them to do, or the ability to be consistent from one millisecond to the next. Say what you will of Russell Hantz: his goal is always to sit at the end with a jury of people *he perceives* will respect his gameplay, up against a woman *he perceives* is weaker than him. What's compelling about Russell is that when playing with people who aren't onto him, he always gets exactly that...but that his perceptions of how he and those women will be perceived are so drastically, almost comically wrong. He can make what he wants to happen happen...but he wants the wrong things to happen. There's none of that going on with Brandon. He's just a crazy person. Like this speech about how lying to get Mikayla out made him a "villain" when he wanted to be a "hero" - well, no. Actually, lying to get her out has nothing to do with anything - that lie accomplished nothing. Wanting Mikayla out in the first place (because he thought he would end up having sex with her otherwise) is when he stopped being a hero. But in this case, the opposite of "hero" isn't "villain". It's "batshit-crazy nineteen-year-old with a 'loco' neck tattoo".

Redemption Island duel - Ben, Stacey, Elyse and Ozzy go to view the duel. Christine: "I just articulated what everyone else was saying" about voting Ben out first. Well, that explains why he was the first voted out and why Christine made final three. Or...no, wait, that's not what happened at all. God, I hate this season so much.

In preparation for the challenge, Semhar recites another poem. Can I just say, her poems, in addition to sucking, all seem to revolve around some man she doesn't know who she's obsessively in love with, and it's kind of disturbing? There's some guy out there who needs a restraining order. Probst asks if reciting poems "calms" Semhar. Semhar agrees: "Like crazy!" I'm not sure if something can calm you like crazy. I think the craziness kind of countervails the calmness. Christine, meanwhile, is all business. Probst describes the challenge: "Take your first pole. Get it where you want it." I'm pretty sure that's what Semhar's poem was about, so you'd think she has an advantage here. Anyway, this challenge takes several minutes. You know, that's the worst part of Redemption Island. I've seen others say that if they had a Redemption Island, but didn't spend so much time on it - just had it happening off-screen, like the Outcasts in Pearl Islands - it'd be a good twist. That's an interesting thought. I mean, this is time we could be spending watching Cochran!

...okay, never mind. I wish this whole show was one big RI duel.

Christine wins the challenge, is obnoxious some more.

Brandon: "This morning, God was chastising me big-time." Is that...how that works? I know no religious people who feel that God is constantly giving them feedback on their behaviour, unless possibly they're Joan of Arcadia. I can't deal. Then he reveals that he's Russell's nephew to the tribe, and Stacey does a brief dance of surprise. Okay, that was great.

You know what I don't understand? This idea he's peddling that it was somehow dishonest not to advertise that he's a Hantz. This is not (from what they've shown) a Gary Hogeboom situation where he's made up a false identity. He wasn't going around saying that he was Brandon Hawkins, landscaper, and that he's the nephew of Russell Hawkins, who's never played Survivor before. So far, he's done three things on this show:

1. Not advertised whose nephew he is;
2. Lied at tribal council;
3. Hallucinated that a girl who has no use for him is trying to seduce him, and tried to get her voted out of the game because he's scared he'll succumb to her fictitious wooing.

Two of these things are totally normal. The level of quasi-shame he's showing over these normal things - counterbalanced against the pride he's showing in the third one, which is just frightening - really disturbs me. "Coach", God bless him, gives a nice speech about how Brandon is "showing his age", which is classy.

Hooray, Papa Bear! Papa Bear gives a very self-aware confessional about how he, Dawn and "Cochran" are on the bottom because of their demographics. He loses some points for ascribing "Cochran"'s outsider status to his nerdiness and not to the real problem, his outsize abrasive insecurity about his nerdiness, but then he gets those points back for calling "Cochran" "John", which is his damn name. Papa Bear is really in the worst possible Survivor position. He's old enough and out-of-shape enough to be a challenge liability, and he's socially savvy enough (former detective, etc.) to be a strategic threat. If you had two challenge liabilities to vote out, who are you going to take out first, the detective or the crying lady? Poor Papa Bear.

You know, I think one of the problems with modern Survivor is that it relies far too heavily on the confessional. My favourite thing in Survivor is seeing smart players actually converse with one another, like Yul and Penner's strategic conversations in Cook Islands. Let's see what South Pacific has to offer in that vein! Ozzy pulls Keith aside because of their "certain brother-type thing going on".

Ozzy: "I have the idol!"
Keith: "Sweet!"

Then Keith and Whitney:
Keith: "Ozzy found it."
Whitney: "You're sure?"
Keith: "Yup."
Whitney: "*indistinct*"
Keith: "Yup."
Whitney: "He told you?"
Keith: "Yup."
*mouth-blur indicating profanity*
Yup.

Many people examining this scene would be offended by the obvious producer interference here, but I just want to know how the producers managed to resurrect Shakespeare and convince him to write such erudite dialogue.

More Mikayla/Brandon - she pulls him aside to talk through their issues. You know, you can't mix Survivor and hurt feelings. You just can't. I hate Terry Deitz a lot, but one of my favourite Survivor moments is when Aras accused him of hating women, and then he pulled Aras aside and said something to the effect that that comment goes beyond the game and that they need to talk it out in a non-game way, and then they did, and then that didn't mean that they had an F2 alliance all of a sudden. They were still rivals in the game, but they'd buried the hatchet about that one personal incident. You can't do what Mikayla is doing here and try to conflate "you don't like me" with "you tried to get me out of the game". Brandon, as crazy as he is, is *allowed* to try to get her out of the game. If she knows the Hantz family at all, she should know that strong women scare Hantzes. If she wants to talk out Brandon's issues with her, she can do that, but it won't work, because he's insane. If she wants to improve her place in the game, she has to try to get *him* out. A conversation that is simultaneously about "why are you mean to me" and about "why do you want to vote me out", it doesn't work.

Oh, God, I'm going to be sick. He's pretending that others want to vote her out but that "as a Christian", he "has to be meek". That's such utter bullshit.

Sophie confessional: "I think Brandon is really torn between following whatever crazy religious beliefs he has, and yet he inherently in his bloodline is just a devious jerk." Again, smart. Again, Sophie is impressing me. I'm sure there must have been an outcry here at her calling his religious beliefs crazy, but...they kind of are. Being religious isn't crazy, but "WOMEN HAVE TO GO AWAY BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME HAVE NAUGHTY THOUGHTS but oh I'm meek", that's textbook crazy. I still find it hard to respect the play of those who are aligned with him - Sophie said herself, he's a loose cannon, and it's Survivor 101, you don't align with loose cannons, or else they'll end up firing at you. In the words of a great Survivor strategist, cannons are designed to hurt.

Now Mikayla is crying. Now Brandon is crying. Now Brandon's talking about the "constant battle, good/evil", going on within him. I've yet to see the "good". It's more like "evil/kind of evil".

Then a great moment of "Coach" talking strategy to Sophie - to his credit, he's right about stuff for once - and Sophie just standing there nodding, occasionally saying "yeah", affixing him with a super-intense "you are very wise and I am fortunate to get to soak up your wisdom" stare. That is the very best Survivor skill - active listening - and it's exactly how you play Coach. I just saw someone posit on Previously on Survivor that Ethan "did nothing" in Africa, and I thought, well, yeah - 95% of his game was standing there listening intently to everyone and making them feel like the most important person in the universe. Any wonder they wanted him to have a million dollars? Then she wraps up this segment by saying, "I just hope (Brandon's aggression) doesn't bite us in the butt." That, to me, is the *other* great Survivor skill (and another thing Ethan was great at, coincidentally): you always, always, always, always frame things as about what's best for "us". Realistically, Brandon's bond with "Coach" and hatred of women makes him a great little pet for Coach and a threat to Sophie, not to Coach and Sophie...but here's Sophie, selling it as being about "us". Well done.

GEORGE'S OPINION OF SOPHIE UPDATE: So far, I still think she's the weakest winner, edging out maybe Fabio, if that. The little things she's doing that are impressing me don't make her a Richard Hatch or a Brian Heidik or even a Denise Stapley, and to the degree that she's doing certain little things right, I think they're outweighed by her dangerous decision to be a woman aligning with two guys who hate women. (Just because you win in spite of a move doesn't make it a good move.) But she's clearly *there*, she's clearly *playing*, and she's clearly doing some things right. I will retire my "Natalie Tenerelli with a bitter jury" line.

"F*** you George."

Immunity challenge! Savaii glaring daggers at Upolu, Edna grinning in a simultaneously friendly and oblivious manner. I really love Edna. Like, not as a player, but I think if I had to be friends with someone from this season, it would be Edna.

You know, I don't care about challenges at all unless Penner is talking, Ozzy is swimming, or a mind-over-matter challenge monster (Kim, Heidik, Westman) is playing. None of those things really happen here. (Ozzy kind of floats at some points, but there's no proper swimming.) I would be happy to just have Probst recap the challenge at the end. "So-and-so won." The only thing I find entertaining about this challenge is that Probst, who has trouble deciding whether "Savaii" is two syllables or three, pronounces it with two, three, and at one point four syllables ("Sav-ay-ah-ee") during the course of this challenge. I wonder if it has to do with how much time he has to fill up?

Upolu wins immunity. Two-thirds of the way into the show, John hasn't talked yet. I have a feeling that's going to change. Jim gives an obnoxious confessional about how Papa Bear should have been the first out - which is why you pushed for Semhar, right, Jim? Ozzy says it's between "Cochran" and Papa Bear. I begin rooting for "Cochran" to go even though I know that's not what happens. Then Ozzy hatches a plan: vote Papa Bear; tell Papa Bear it's Cochran. They tell Cochran this plan; Cochran whines about his name coming up.

I've always thought, this early in the game, there's no reason to get adorable with this stuff. Five is more than three. Just tell Papa Bear he's going. What can that hurt? And Cochran's tantrum about "his name coming up" - well, no. Your name is not "up". This is just a vintage Ozzy overplay, and a good player wouldn't let it get to him, which is just one more reason Cochran is not a good player. They tell Papa Bear they're voting for Cochran; he doesn't believe it, because he's, quote, not an ass. So to sum up: all the "tell Papa Bear it's Cochran" plan has accomplished is to spook Cochran. These guys are all idiots.

I rest my case.

Ozzy: "It's incredibly funny to watch everybody scrambling, stressed out..." See, this is another reason Coach's team is doing better than Ozzy's. Coach tries to keep his people on an even keel. Ozzy? Ozzy enjoys the chaos that, ultimately, leads to Cochran flipping and costing Savaii the numbers.

Okay, TC. I can't muster much enthusiasm for early TCs. There's a 5; there's a 3; if the 5 are smart, they'll pick off the 3. Papa Bear's argument to Jim that Papa Bear doesn't have to worry, because he's in the 3, but that Jim does have to worry, because he's in the 5...that confuses me. Does Papa Bear get that 5 is more than 3? Is he saying Jim has to worry about going into a merge of 12 with an alliance of 5 and someone clearly on the bottom? Because, to me, that's Savaii's clearest and biggest problem. They should be doing more to cultivate Dawn as an Edna type who'll be loyal despite being outside the alliance. Of course, they don't end up going in with an alliance of 5 and someone clearly on the bottom - they stupidly sabotage their own alliance and end up with a 4 and two people clearly on the bottom.

I've got to say, on rewatch, that's my favourite thing about this season: knowing that the tribe that botches Survivor 101 is the one that loses. I think Upolu (especially Sophie) is screwing up by keeping loose-cannon Brandon in the game...but that's not *as* stupid as deliberately setting it up so that you'll go into a merge of 12 four strong against a cohesive 6 and two who have all the incentive in the world to flip. In summary, everyone here is playing badly, but Coach and Sophie are playing the least badly, so far.

Banter

Mark Kalzer

So let me frame this up... you assert that while you're coming around to liking Sophie, you still place her low on the ranking of winners because she continues to work with Brandon. Is that accurate Mr. Hawtin?

George Hawtin

So far. I mean, she makes it work for her in the end, which counts for something. But it just seems like an unnecessary risk. What does she gain from working with Brandon that she wouldn't get from swapping Mikayla into the Brandon role? And if your answer to that is, "She has to keep Coach happy"...that's respectable *within the confines of South Pacific*, but I don't remember Boston Rob in Redemption Island taking orders from Phillip on who could be in the alliance and who couldn't. If we're accepting the argument of Sophie fans that "Sophie is the mastermind, Coach is Sophie's goat", he shouldn't be able to dictate that someone who's dangerous to Sophie stays in the alliance.

So basically, for me, either a., Coach is running the show and Sophie happens to benefit from people not liking Coach (which makes her a credible, but bottom-tier, winner) or b., Sophie is running the show and thinks it's a good idea to work with Brandon (also not a great feather in her cap).

Mark Kalzer

Now you also talk about that factor of predictability. So far from Brandon we've seen spats of lying followed by confessionals to the entire group. So what can we predict from him? That he may lie from time to time... but that he'll own up to it later on out of guilt.

I might argue that it's better to ally with moral players because at least you know they won't be entirely ruthless.

I realize you take things like podcast interviews with a grain of salt... but that it was discussed quite a lot on Dom & Colin. Sophie made it clear... Coach really believes in honour and integrity. Coach and Brandon both... they both want to play honest games at heart.

I know it's tough. They actually all like Brandon a lot. Day 1 is where you make your first impressions. Day 1 Brandon who wasn't known as a Hantz at the time was the nice hardworking charming kid he was most of the time. The Mikayla incident unfortunately brought out the worst in him.

I think it's clear Brandon is a terrible Survivor player from pretty much any angle. So the question really becomes... do you want to ally with smart players or terrible players?

George Hawtin

That's an important consideration too: the edit is showing us Brandon at his worst. According to outside-the-game interviews I've heard, Brandon actually had moments of likability, which I personally am not seeing. If they generally like him and he's only acting like a crazy person 5% of the time, then I can see why Sophie is putting up with him.

She does seem *aware* of what's going on - that aligning with him could backfire, like anything can backfire in Survivor. So I give her points for that.

Ideally, for me, you want to align with predictable, not-that-smart players. It's not like the alliance is having to choose between Brandon and Rob Cesternino. They're having to choose between Brandon and *Mikayla*, who doesn't seem that smart to me. I think a Tom Westman would have been able to swap Mikayla in for Brandon. But that's not Sophie's game.

Mark Kalzer

Look at the field of people on Upolu. Stacey is quite likely to flip. Edna already looks to be loyal via Coach. So what about Mikayla? If you try to sub her in place of Brandon, you may loose Coach. That's Coach and Brandon you lose... two whole votes compared to the single vote Mikayla brings.

George Hawtin

Oh, yeah. I think Sophie played these people as well as she could. I just don't know how you square the "she had to give Coach what he wanted" argument with the "she was running the show" argument.

Mark Kalzer

It's rarely a good idea to make big moves pre merge. Sets a terrible precedent.

Well I don't know if she was running the show in a literal sense. I also don't think running the show is the most important thing.

George Hawtin

Oh, I agree!

Mark Kalzer

Being in on the running of the show is important. Oftentimes I think having someone like Coach who wants to be the figurehead is a good idea.

So long as you can separate yourself from the that figurehead as time goes on.

George Hawtin

But there are those who argue that she was a Boston Rob/Tom Westman show-runner, and that claim is where a lot of my irritation with Sophie comes from, because she didn't play that sort of game, and those who claim she did not watch the same show I did.

But, as you say, that's not the only kind of game.

I think Natalie White, for example, played an awesome game.

"Someone likes me?"

Mark Kalzer

I don't know who those people are who say Sophie was Boston Rob. Sophie won on her first time out.

I'm just more surprised that at this point we haven't seen Albert talk at all in confessional. I used to think he was much more visible pre-merge.

I mean... he's a final 3'er.

George Hawtin

I was referring to Rob's RI game. A lot of people claim that Sophie "ran" South Pacific in that way.

Yeah, absolutely. I sent a friend an e-mail when this was originally airing, fairly early in the season, in which I compared Albert to Yul.

Now I'm wondering where I ever saw that.

Or when I ever saw Albert.

Mark Kalzer

He's only talked in group shots.

Yet he's in a day 1 two person alliance with Sophie. Somehow I knew that during my first time watching this.

I actually expected Sophie to be more invisible. But she's had a confessional every episode in.

She's filling that role for the producers as that calm sensible narrator that Coach and Brandon cannot be. She's rational and calls things the way they are without exaggeration or 'Coach'isms.

George Hawtin

And they're good confessionals, too!

Yeah, exactly. She's very rational.

Mark Kalzer

For some reason in Caramoan they thought Phillip worked as a lead narrator.

George Hawtin

Self-oriented players just can't narrate.

Mark Kalzer

This is that Pirates of the Caribbean thing. Coach is basically Jack Sparrow. In theory that character is strong enough to carry an entire movie, but when you try to work him as the sole lead it just doesn't work. Coach needs a straight person to be there to comment on the things happening.

So who was it around Phillip? Cochran? Maybe Dawn? Francesca?

George Hawtin

Though Coach's awareness of what's going on around him has improved from his first two games, I will say.

That's the thing: there *were* no good narrators on Caramoan. I'd argue there were no good players on Caramoan.

Mark Kalzer

Corrine?

Caramoan will probably go down as the worst edited season of Survivor.

George Hawtin

She's more of a "give an entertaining bitchy confessional" type than an "accurately and dispassionately narrate the season" type, though.

Not that she isn't trying...

Mark Kalzer

All right... on to Savaii. I'm looking closely, and while I'm not seeing any outright bullying of Cochran, I think it's fair to see that he is somewhat ostracized.

They talk openly in confessional about there being an alliance of 5. The real moment of integration for Cochran appears to be coming next week.

George Hawtin

Yeah, Savaii is playing terribly. They should *not* be making it so clear that there's an alliance of 5.

They don't just talk about it in confessional. They own up to it at TC.

Mark Kalzer

See they'll argue later on in exit interviews that everyone had Cochran in their final 3, and that it was therefore foolish for Cochran to flip. But it seems that right now Cochran has every reason to want to flip at a merge situation.

The only thing that changes is that the Savaii 5 turn on one another. Which again only proves the point that nobody on the tribe is trustworthy.

If I'm in Cochran's position, I'd expect Jim Rice to have a final 3 with everybody but Papa Bear.

George Hawtin

Yeah, I don't really remember the circumstances of the Elyse boot, but it wouldn't inspire confidence if I were someone who was going to align with Jim.

I seem to recall it as a Hantzian "I'm going to make a big move that screws me over just to prove that I can make a big move" maneuver.

Mark Kalzer

It was to weaken Ozzy. We'll see that in the next two weeks.

It's one of those things that are so tempting to pull in ORGs.

George Hawtin

But, again, if you've got a final 5 alliance with Ozzy, it's *stupid* to try to weaken Ozzy.

Mark Kalzer

Did I mention that in my last ORG we had a power shift in pretty much every pre-merge boot?

George Hawtin

I've never watched a season this closely or this critically, but I find that the show is making real parallels between the two tribes.

I don't know if that usually happens.

Mark Kalzer

I think it does. They spend a lot more time editing these than we do watching them.

George Hawtin

But right now we're seeing a strong 5 on Upolu that sticks together even when it seems like a bad idea, versus a really weak 5 on Savaii that eventually devours itself. Is it any wonder that the Upolu 5 are (basically) the final 5?

Mark Kalzer

It's sort of why they made such a big deal of Coach getting such a cool reaction to joining his tribe. It was setting up the arc for him and Ozzy going on opposite trajectories in terms of respect within their tribes.

This is also why it's harder for us to remember players like Sophie even if they win. For story telling and dramatic purposes, you need twists and turns. You need power shifts. You need people to rise and fall, often repeatedly within the same season so that the underdogs don't stray into becoming the top dogs for too long. Sophie's win is one of the more straight and narrow gameplans in Survivor.

George Hawtin

In the past, I've complained about Cochran not doing the obvious thing and sticking with Jim and Dawn. But on rewatch, it's not so obvious.

Mark Kalzer

I may have mentioned this before in a blog post, but Cochran started the game very badly. He's never been in a position this season where he had anyone he could turn to as a reliable ally. Without that it's very hard to succeed in Survivor.

Really only Sandra can carry herself despite losing her closest allies.

Oh and Danni.

George Hawtin

We really haven't seen Cochran try, is what frustrates me about him.

Mark Kalzer

He's talking about it. He's also talking about trying too hard.

Give credit where it's due... he's in a bad situation but he'll wait it out and make the merge. He should have been bottom 3 in Savaii.

George Hawtin

Oh, absolutely. If I were looking for physical strength, I'd have probably booted him before Semhar.

He averted that. He gets points.

Mark Kalzer

What I'm looking for is the part where he refers to bullying. Is it something he's been saying in exit interviews or is it possible that was just stuff he used at the merge to curry favour?

George Hawtin

Yeah, it hasn't come up yet.

Mark Kalzer

He is clearly ostracized at this point. That much is clear. In high school that's basically the same as bullying.

George Hawtin

Yeah, Savaii is playing badly by letting him know how ostracized he is.

I mean, Survivor is basically "ostracize one person every round", so you can't fault them for making an alliance without them in it. But he shouldn't KNOW.

Mark Kalzer

Gotta give Coach credit where it is also due. He's giving Edna as much rope as she needs to hang on.

George Hawtin

And Cochran is absolutely the type who'd get insecure about the "tell Papa Bear it's Cochran" plan.

Didn't somebody once blow up an entire season over being used the way Cochran was used in that circumstance?

Mark Kalzer

Yes... and here's the thing I don't quite get... why tell Papa Bear it's Cochran? Why lie?

Except for the fact that if you're Ozzy, not lying means admitting you know where the idol is right?

George Hawtin

Yeah, the whole thing is vintage Ozzy-trying-to-strategize.

Mark Kalzer

You're thinking of Erinn from Tocantins I think.

George Hawtin

Someone posted a quote in Previously on Survivor that I don't remember from Fiji, where Earl says, "This is what happens when Dreamz tries to think by himself." I, personally, would put Dreamz's Survivor brain up against a hundred Ozzys. He's so strategically inept.

Mark Kalzer

I think partially the reason the producers continue to put idols out is because it forces players to lie. But if Redemption Island is in play and the person you're voting out might come back... I don't think it's smart to lie.

George Hawtin

There's no reason to lie in that situation unless you're thinking, "We're on Survivor! Lying is the point of the game!" And that's not too smart.

Mark Kalzer

You really only lie to prevent someone from playing the idol.

Ozzy is basically lying not just to Papa Bear, but also to Jim Rice.

And it's pointless. We've seen people lead alliances with the immunity idols in plain sight. That's cultivates fear of going against you.

Right now it seems the one in the best position on Savaii is Keith. He's the conduit for all the information. He's on the inner of all configurations of the 5 person alliance. And Whitney will rock him back and forth on the hammock. He's got all the power.

George Hawtin

Yeah. Throwing a challenge to get rid of Billy was pointless, too. Ozzy isn't so much with thinking. He sure can swim, though.

Mark Kalzer

Too bad the only way I remember him is to think of him and Whitney.

Oh yeah... THAT Keith.  

George Hawtin

I think we've talked about this before - maybe not in the context of Ozzy - but Ozzy is lovable when he's the underdog and insufferable when he's in power.

Did they [Keith and Whitney] end up getting married? They did, right?

Mark Kalzer

I think so.

Well I mentioned before in this very conversation... from a producing standpoint you want there to be an underdog. But if the underdog triumphs too early, they become the top dog and then everyone turns against him or her.

I've also talked in PoS about how we all love Zane, but we might have felt differently about him if he had actually had any Hantz like power.

... and lasted

How could you hate this guy?

George Hawtin

There's an interesting debate going on in PoS right now about whether Jenna Morasca was an "11th-hour winner". Some say she came out of nowhere; others say she laid the groundwork the whole time (before coming out of nowhere). What's neat about Sophie is that she absolutely seemed like an 11th-hour winner to me at the time, but rewatching the season, she seems like a winner from the start.

Mark Kalzer

Narrative storytelling always favours the underdog story. Just look to the Rocky movies. Every single one of them is an underdog story. Even after he's become champ.

Now do you look upon Jenna as a day one winner when you re-watch Amazon?

George Hawtin

I don't think so, but I haven't seen it for a while.

The problem with Jenna is, she's so tight with Heidi, who's basically a buffoon, so it becomes easy to dismiss Jenna.

Mark Kalzer

The Survivor Historians went into this in depth recently, so I'll keep it brief. Basically the problem with Jenna's edit is that Matthew was edited as the awesome hero with only slight insanities, while Christy is the one we're all meant to sympathize with and love.

Jenna was the one who clashed with them. Ergo she becomes the default villain.

George Hawtin

That's one of my least-favourite Survivor tropes, the "default villain", but I agree that it's a thing.

Mark Kalzer

You can really only appreciate Jenna in hindsight. Here at least Sophie is the voice of reason from day one.

George Hawtin

Put Ami Cusack or the Horsemen up against your average Survivor player, *they're the hero*. But put them up against Chris and Yau-Man and Earl, they're not just the antagonist; they're the EVIL VILLAIN.

But, yeah, Sophie certainly seems like the voice of reason from day one here. I agree with that.

And while I think aligning with Brandon is an imperfection in her game, there's no such thing as a perfect Survivor game, and at least she's aware of the risk she's taking.

Mark Kalzer

Back in Borneo, everybody HATED Richard. He was the villain, and NOTHING made him a hero cause he was never once an underdog.

George Hawtin

(He was the hero to me, but I'm weird. I agree, the show sold him as a villain.)

Pictured : Not an underdog.

Mark Kalzer

It's almost impossible to frame someone as a hero when they're always in a position of power.

Unless that person is Colby.

I don't think the show sold him as a villain... Richard Hatch outright choose to BE the villain! He's not hiding it!

But just go down the heroes tribe in HvV. The only ones I can think of who ever had outright power from start to finish was Tom Westman.

(I'm referring to their previous seasons of course)

George Hawtin

Yeah, for sure. Sugar and Amanda were always in good positions, but they didn't seem to be "in power" in the Westman sense.

Mark Kalzer

Okay... we should trail this back to South Pacific somehow....

George Hawtin

I would love to see Sophie play an All-Stars season to see if she plays the same game or if she tries to be more of a leader.

Mark Kalzer

It depends who she gets stuck with. She's willing to be a leader but it's hard when you have personalities like Boston Rob around. They need to be the leader innately and will not share it.

Anything to say about redemption island? It was about 10 minutes of challenge that never pays off down the road....

George Hawtin

Yeah, especially this early, I don't care about Redemption Island. Semhar and Christine are both terrible players and not particularly likable characters; I don't care which of them gets to stay alive in the game.

RI is at least compelling, if not good, when you get a player on there like Ozzy or Matt who *could win the game* if he gets back into it.

Mark Kalzer

And it's so early that it feels insignificant. If they follow the same pattern as last season (which they did) no one will return until the merge. We don't expect either of these two to win every duel.

George Hawtin

But if Christine gets back into the game, no matter who she's in there with, it looks like,

"Welcome back, Christine!"

*randomly insults everyone*

"'Bye again, Christine!"

"I'll just let myself out."

Mark Kalzer

But you also raise the other thing I don't like about it... it favours only challenge ability.

I actually rather appreciate the Pearl Island style where it at least fell back to typical Survivor voting. You still have to have some sort of social game to get back in.

Maybe if Redemption Island followed that format I'd get behind it. With this duel format there's no way a Sandra can ever return from it.

It's even worse with returning players. All the duels are based on challenges they've done before, often repeatedly. Someone like Ozzy who's spent two and 3/4s of a season doing challenges is far more experienced than everyone else on the cast minus Coach.

You might as well not even bother voting out Ozzy pre merge even if he's on the outs. It'll do you absolutely no good.

George Hawtin

And...someone who's Ozzy is someone who's Ozzy, also.

(That was some trenchant analysis.)

Pictured : Ozzy being Ozzy.

It'd be like if they brought Russell Hantz back for a season in which you could advance in the game just by giving confessionals about how great you are.

Mark Kalzer

Wasn't that going to be the format of your ORG?

George Hawtin

I was calling for general confessionals, not just Russell confessionals.

I'm sad that I didn't get a cast for that.

Mark Kalzer

Allright... I should close it out here then.

George Hawtin

Sounds like a plan.

Mark Kalzer

Once again we've said nothing about the person booted.

Neither Semhar nor Papa Bear.

George Hawtin

Semhar is the worst.

Sorry Semhar.

Mark Kalzer

Oh be nice. She might be reading this.

George Hawtin

Papa Bear...again, based on the edit, I don't feel bad for him. He seemed so socially aware, but we never see him *do* anything.

Like how Christine could've stayed in the game last week by voting against Stacey, Papa Bear should have been in there trying to sell them a Cochran boot. I didn't see that.

Mark Kalzer

I admit... seeing him on the hammock when he should be scrambling was disappointing.

George Hawtin

Again, it's like Cochran: assuming you're on the bottom because of your age or shape becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Remember in Vanuatu when the chubby guy singlehandedly lost them the first challenge and then sat around feeling sorry for himself and was the first booted? NO, ME NEITHER.

Okay - gotta run. See you in the car.